motherocker

Changes are afoot

2010-07-25T19:27:00.000-07:00

I know it's been awhile- and it will be a while longer. Big changes are coming!

Exersaucer

2010-04-29T06:24:00.000-07:00

Homemade Granola

2010-04-25T18:48:00.000-07:00

Almost every morning for breakfast I eat fruit with yogurt and granola. I started this when I was in weight loss mode because it was easy to adjust the portion of each item depending on how many calories I wanted to consume. Granola is one of those things that I always told myself I would make at home if I ever got the chance to stop doing the 9 to 5.

Now that I have made it a number of times I can tell you- don't make the same mistake I did! It is so incredibly easy to do and the benefits of making your own are many. For one, you can control the amount of sugar and fat that go into it. (Store bought is generally much higher than homemade) And best of all you get to customize it to your own individual taste and how you like to use it.

Below I've given you a blueprint (similar to my fried rice and risotto entries) for how to start making your very own granola at home. Granola is so incredibly versatile and forgiving that once you begin playing with it you will start to learn what proportions of each item you prefer. Keep in mind that although it may look like a lot of steps it actually only takes about 10 minutes to throw all the ingredients together. It does take a bit of time in the oven- but you can be doing plenty of other things while it's in there.

Here's what you will need:

4 cups rolled oats (not instant!)
2 cups other hoo-ha (nuts, seeds, coconut, etc)
1/2- 1 tsp salt
1/2- 1 1/4 cups sweetener + fat (sweetener: honey, maple syrup, brown sugar. fat: non-flavorful oil such as canola or vegetable or butter)
Optional: Spices and flavorings (vanilla, cinnamon, cardamom, nutmeg, etc)
Optional: 1 cup dried fruit (raisins, cherries, chopped apricots, craisins, etc.)

Because I primarily eat my granola as an accompaniment to fruit I like to keep it as simple as possible so I know it will go with whatever fruit I choose to pair it with. (1 nut, 1 sweetener, no additional flavorings, no dried fruit) However, if you like to eat your granola plain with yogurt or milk, or to snack on it out of hand you may want to get a bit more adventurous with your add-ins.

1. Set your oven to 250

2. Line a rimmed baking sheet with parchment paper. (if you don't have parchment you can grease your baking sheet but really- you should buy parchment! It is cheap, reusable and has a million applications)

3. Chop any nuts you are using. I like my nuts to have a presence in the granola without doing a number on the roof of my mouth so I size them accordingly. These pecan halves I just cut in half. Almonds I'll chop pretty small. Often recipes call for you to use sliced almonds so if you have those on hand or don't mind spending the extra money to buy them at the store that's a great option.

4. Put all your dry ingredients in a large bowl. This is typically the oats + nuts, seeds coconut* etc.** The ratio is completely up to you as long as you total 2 cups. Here I just add two cups of straight up pecans. You could do a cup of pecans and a cup of walnuts. You could do a cup of pecans, 1/2 cup almonds, 1/4 cup green pumpkin seeds, and 1/4 cup wheat germ. I mean seriously, your options are endless. And really, you could put more than 2 cups of stuff in there the proportions I'm giving are more of a launch pad than anything.

5. Add salt. At least 1/2 a tsp and no more than 1 tsp. We don't want salty granola! (Unless you make it really sweet, then you could have sweet and salty granola..mmmmmm) Stir well.

5(b) Add spice(s) as you prefer. Start with no more than 1/4 teaspoon of each on your first try and then you can adjust to taste. (if using vanilla, add it with or after the wet ingredients) Stir well.

6. Now it's time to combine your wet ingredients. Again the ratio is completely up to you. Keep in mind the more sweetener the more clumping. I have tried it with as little as 1/4 cup each of fat and sweetener (not much clumping, barest hint of sweetness) A good starting point would be 1/2 cup of each. Pictured I have 2/3 cup sweetener (maple syrup if you must know) and 1/4 cup fat (canola oil) because I am crazy like that. Sometimes recipes call for you to heat them first but I've made it both ways and can't really see a big difference. If you are using butter and are melting it anyway I guess you might as well but otherwise why dirty a pan?

I think the important thing is to make sure the fat and sweetener are well blended so that they will evenly coat the dry ingredients.

7. Add your wet ingredients to your dry ingredients. (BLORP!)

8. Mix that shizz until it is well blended.

9. Pour the mixture onto your (parchment lined!) pan and spread out evenly

10. Stick it in the middle of your preheated oven and bake for 1 hour to 1 1/4 hour stirring occasionally to make sure everything gets well toasted. (I like to set my timer in 15 minute increments so I don't forget about it)

11. Take it out of the oven, add dried fruit if you choose, stir and let cool. After about 10-15 minutes give it a stir. Depending on the amount and type of sweetener you used it may be stuck together and you might have to knock it around a bit to get it into the size clumps/pieces you want. You will notice mine is not clumpy at all. (Don't wait too long or you may end up with a giant granola bar!)

12. Once it is cooled completely store it in an airtight container. It will last on the counter for 10-14 days but if you keep it in the fridge it will last a month or more. (As if you would need to!)

* For some reason almost every granola recipe calls for shredded coconut, but almost no commercial brand of granola has coconut as an ingredient. Why is this? A mystery I will never know.....(PS. I'm not a fan of the coconut so I never use it)
** If you use brown sugar as a sweetener it can also be added to the dry ingredients. However, if you choose to do it that way it's a good idea to add 1/4 cup of liquid sweetener such as honey or maple syrup to promote clumping. Brown sugar can also be melted over med-low heat and added with liquid ingredients.

Keeping You Posted

2010-04-18T14:28:00.000-07:00

Exciting updates...

We've accepted a slot for K at a school that has recess, gym twice a week, music and art once a week. Hopefully they will have a small class size as well. There is still a chance that Miss D could be offered a second round spot in a gifted or magnet program but we are feeling pretty good about the school she will probably end up at- even if it is a bit of a hike.

For those of you not in the know, the volunteering I will be doing is with a Teen Leadership group. The group started an organic garden last year. This year they received a grant to expand the garden, start a farmers market in their neighborhood, and do some community workshops. I will be using my training expertise to help them develop and execute the community workshops. I am toying with the idea of taking on contract training work once Miss D is in school so this will be a good test as well as something to put on the ol' resume. I got my first taste of working with the teens yesterday when Miss D and I put in some labor cleaning out some of the beds. Should be interesting!

Out of the blue, we were presented with the opportunity to visit my sister and her family (along with my parents) in FL for Memorial Day weekend. We are so excited as we haven't seen each other in over a year. The cousins will get to play together and everyone will get to meet Bubba for the first time!

Of course, now I have a month to get the kid to sleep in a crib....sighz.

Happiness is...

2010-04-09T11:10:00.001-07:00

Both kids in bed by 8

Spring is Spronging

2010-04-07T18:39:00.000-07:00

The weather is all over the map, the flower beds are full of weeds to be pulled and spring is here again.

We are truly fortunate to have had some incredible spring weather. Generally spring in Chicago is cold and wet until June when it is suddenly scorching.

I have been taking the Bubs for lots of walks and Miss D has had much playground time.

Last weekend, I got the bright idea to move the swing upstairs and the Bubs has been sleeping 7+ hours at a stretch at night in it. Wish I had thought of it a month and a half ago- but very, very grateful and starting to feel like a human being again. At some point he will have to transition out of it but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

Now that I have hit a groove with my new SAHM lifestyle, I am really enjoying it. There are still never enough hours in the day to do all the things I want to accomplish. But I appreciate being able to spend all this time taking care of my family in a way I wasn't able to when I was working.

I am even thinking about fashion again a little! I finally got all of my wardrobe out of my daughters closet and back into mine. So very many work clothes. Not very appropriate for the mom on the go. I have lost most of the weight (maybe 5 lbs to go to get to pre-baby) but of course my body is not the same. Now that i am rested i don't really have an excuse not to be finding a few moments to do some crunches, and yet, I haven't found them yet! ;)

Public School

2010-03-26T14:55:00.000-07:00

Husband and I have been obsessing the past two weeks over which (if any) public schools* Miss D will be accepted to. I applied to about 30. So far I have received 2 acceptances (from schools who accepted everyone) two waitlists and one no. The clock is ticking and you have to let the schools know by mid-April if you want the slot or not. It's enough to drive anyone batshit!

If you were wondering what public school in the urban market is looking like these days, here is a list of things you may be surprised to learn the children are not entitled to:

RECESS: Many schools do not offer recess. I visited one that only has it during the warmer months (during the winter they have free play in their classrooms, but no running around time). There is another local school where the teachers got together and voted to offer recess to the children, because they felt it was important, but the teachers are not paid for the recess time.

GYM: Many schools do not offer gym at all. Others may have it once a week or on a limited basis.

LUNCH THAT IS LONGER THAN 15 MINUTES: Seriously. 15 minutes to eat.

ARTS: Music, Visual Arts, Drama, etc. I guess this is no surprise. If your school still offers even one of these, it is probably because you have a strong parents group that has raised the funds for it themselves.

ATHLETICS: See above

COMPUTERS, SCIENCE LAB (FOR OLDER GRADES), ETC.

This is why people move to the suburbs.

*If you're wondering why I don't have my daughter attend our neighborhood school, it's because we live in an immigrant-heavy neighborhood and the school is majority ESL.

Give a Little- Get a Little

2010-03-18T18:58:00.000-07:00

I had been toying with the idea that I should find a volunteer opportunity. A positive, proactive way to spend a few hours a week. Maybe even something that might inspire a new career path. Last week the perfect thing dropped into my lap and I'm really excited about it.

I'll tell you more about the actual work later, this post is more about an interesting chain of events that followed.

The project is run through the same non-profit that runs Miss D's preschool. I read about it in the monthly newsletter, thought it was a great idea and touched on some topics I feel really strongly about. I sent the contact an email outlining a few ways by experience and expertise could be utilized. Had a meeting with them this week and offered them my time, and they suggested they would try to find me a stipend! Which - whether it happens or not- was a totally unexpected bonus. Also, it turns out they needed a garden designer ASAP. I suggested a friend. Well, said friend is putting in a bid, and as part of the bid, offered some carpentry work to Husband. So if friend lands the gig, it will be a few dollars for Husband too!

It just goes to show that if you put a little out into the universe, it will come back 10fold. Sometimes really quickly!

Paper Doll

2010-03-17T10:13:00.000-07:00

Miss D made this paper doll of herself a few weeks ago. I was really impressed with how she composed it, by cutting out different parts and gluing them together. (As opposed to trying to cut it out of one piece)

I suspect she was inspired by a book we got out of the library, The Paper Princess.

TurboTax - Freedom Edition

2010-03-16T06:18:00.000-07:00

I did our taxes on Sunday in less than 2 hours. TurboTax made filing incredibly easy. The questions are easy to follow and have a logical sequence. They also provide a feature where you can estimate your itemized deductions and it will tell you if it is worth your while to itemize or more beneficial to take the standard deduction. (still leaving you the option to itemize if you desire)

After all the math is done you can choose to transfer your information and do your state filing as well. With the freedom edition you can efile federally for free, and possibly for state to depending where you live. If you don't qualify for the freedom edition, it may be worth your while to pay for the software. After all, it's deductible!

Best of all, accuracy is guaranteed.

Here's a few things to have on hand when doing your taxes other than all the forms you got in the mail:

- your children's SS #'s (that second one sure makes a difference!)

- your prior year tax return (if efiling- info from it will be used to verify your identity)

Recommended by me!

hangin tough

2010-03-11T06:00:00.000-08:00

Plenty of Stuffs

2010-03-09T05:26:00.001-08:00

First, can I just say that I posted the pic of the cake for my sisters (whom know what it is paying homage to) and I can't believe that neither of them have commented on it!

I guess that's what happens when your posting frequency drops to once a month. Life has been very full and when you go to bed at 8, the days are short!

Bubba Update: For those of you not on the facebook, the Bubs popped two bottom teeth last week. The teething pain seems to be lessening now that they have broke the skin and he's even had a couple of nights with long periods of sleep. (Until last night of course) He is awesome at grabbing toys, not as awesome at getting them to his mouth. His favorite thing to play with is any spit rag (he is quite the spitter) which he holds in two hands and can get to his mouth easily. While he has yet to do any rolling, he is a champion at being pulled to a sitting position- and even a standing position. The only problem is that once he is sitting he wants to let go and he doesn't have the control to stay up there by himself yet. He is very talkative and very interested in observing everything- especially his big sister!

Miss Dukes Update: Miss Dukes is getting a tooth of her own. A big tooth has been growing in behind two of her lower teeth for almost a month- but the baby teeth show very little signs of getting out of the way! Time to find a dentist methinks. She had a grand time at her 5th birthday party which you may have noticed was My Little Pony Themed. The cake barely made it through the singing of the birthday song before the girls grabbed all the horses off of it. She and her 5 friends played freeze dance, beaded their own necklaces and bracelets and got stuff out of the pinata. A grand time for all! The pinata seems fine for another use so we are hoping to take it outside this summer and whack it to death properly. Miss D loves, loves loves her little brother. Particularly squishing his cheeks! She played in her first 3 on 3 soccer tournament (hilarious), where she spent much of the time telling us in the stands what was going on rather than paying attention to the game.

Grown-up Update: We continue to muddle along, trying to make ends meet. I have started to get into a groove with this SAH thing an I'm starting to really enjoy it.

Whoops, both kids up now. ta ta!

And then she was five...

2010-03-07T10:16:00.000-08:00

How the hell am I the mother of a 5 year old? Where does the time go....

Bloody Lucky

2010-03-03T04:30:00.000-08:00

Last night, Miss D woke up at quarter to 2am complaining of "special spit up". Moments later, blood was gushing out of her nose.

I don't remember having many bloody noses as a kid and I guess Husband didn't either. We managed to keep our cool. Husband helped her pinch her nose shut and lean forward while I interrupted the baby's nursing session to run downstairs and google for more info.

By 3 the bleeding had stopped, she was cleaned up and back in bed. I was really thanking the stars that I live in a time when information is so readily available to me. It took only a few moments to determine that what we were seeing was dramatic but normal. A few additional tips to the nose pinching, like applying cold. And how long it might take for the bleeding to stop (and if it didn't stop that we might have to go to the ER and have it packed with gauze)

Hooray for modern times!

Sweet Valley

2010-02-12T15:10:00.000-08:00

I can't believe how much I used to love those books...

It's funny

2010-01-28T14:44:00.000-08:00

Once you get out of the habit of posting regularly, when you get the opportunity to write it's kind of hard to think of anything to say.

Nigh Unto Impossible

2010-01-24T14:21:00.000-08:00

Trying to capture...

...the color of your hair...

...on film.

Dark Ages

2010-01-20T07:19:00.000-08:00

I am not usually a poster of political things, but this is from a friend of mine who wrote it himself from personal experience- and i just couldn't believe it. Can you?

From: MS
Date: Thu, Jan 14, 2010 at 11:41 AM
To: margaret.hamburg@fda.hhs.gov

Dear Dr. Hamburg,

Two days ago, I was turned away at a blood donation center because I’m gay. My excellent health and 11 years in a monogamous, committed relationship notwithstanding, I was told I’ll be similarly banned from any other center I approach (the American Red Cross, etc.) for the same reason. And there’s nothing they can do about it: it’s an FDA mandate, which they are obligated to follow.

So as I walked out of there with my “permanent deferral” – which sounds more like something you give to someone desiring to get out of something (e.g. military service) than to someone seeking to get into something – I truly couldn’t believe what had just happened.

If you’re a man who answers honestly that you have had sex with another man, even once, since 1977, you are shown the door. They cannot and will not consider any other factors – a clean bill of health; a lifestyle choice that involves long-term monogamy, commitment, and safe sex practices; a desire to give of one’s healthy blood because in doing so, there’s not only a health benefit to the donor, but also the win-win of that donation potentially serving someone in need. You’re out. Go to the back of the bus; don’t drink from that fountain; you’re potentially diseased. Your contribution is not wanted because of our government’s official perspective that gay = HIV, without exception.

Now, mind you, you are not asked for proof of your clean health, nor are you asked to prove that your answers on their general questionnaire are indeed the truth. So, I could have opted to lie. In just changing one little answer, my blood would now be in a collecting center, being tested for disease and (I am absolutely sure) being sent on to a place of need. Because that’s the kicker in all of this: they test all the blood they receive anyway. In fact, given the great advances in screening blood for HIV, similar blanket bans on gay blood donations have already been lifted in other countries, but not so in the United States.

So, of course, this “ban” is antiquated. It was put into effect in 1985, during a time of immense fear about HIV and AIDS, when the science (and understanding) was many more paces behind the disease than it is now. Fear has a way of limiting thinking, especially when it comes to our collective need for security. I get that. But after 25 years, we certainly know better.

Just last month, a letter was sent to you by Representative Mike Quigley and ten other members of Congress, asking that the agency reexamine its policy regarding gays and blood donation. I quote (and fully concur) with this statement from their letter: "For many individuals this permanent ban is seen as unfair, discriminatory and serving to simply perpetuate the negative stereotype that all men who have sex with men are HIV positive."

Dr. Hamburg, I am confident that you truly are reexamining this policy. Your record as New York City Commissioner of Health bears testament to your enlightened and sensible views on AIDS education. You've challenged the limited thinking that has perpetuated other outdated, unjust, and harmful policies. Now, you are in a position to be able to change this one.

I thank you for your consideration.

Sincerely,

MS

A fan

2010-01-15T15:19:00.001-08:00

MVI_3577, originally uploaded by motherocker.

This video will give a small thrill to a very small percentage of my readership.

Empathy

2010-01-13T11:19:00.000-08:00

We ended up taking both kids to the doctor today. Bubba had his 2 month check up and Miss D threw up this morning from coughing and i wanted a double check on her tonsils.

Miss D is fine. She wanted to give her brother her finger to squeeze when he got his shots. (Husband does this for her for similar tasks, like getting her hair combed. tangles!)

Bubba actually took the shots very well- but Miss D got very sad and teary. I think she was surprised that watching her brother in pain effected her so much.

My poor sensitive, empathetic little bean. ;)

Celebrate!

2010-01-10T17:16:00.000-08:00

Husband received his very first check for his new business venture yesterday. Only Four months in the making. A pretty amazing achievement, i think!

If you're interested in seeing what he's doing, please check out:

greenresidence.net

Have You Been Missing Me?

2010-01-08T10:15:00.001-08:00

There are a number of reasons you haven't been hearing from me lately, either here or commenting on your blogs. Part of it is the whole baby thing. But a larger chunk is because my access to a computer has been severely limited.

We only have one home computer, and it is Husband's work computer. Now that business is starting to get rolling i don't get to use it much- and when I do I am often too exhausted to compose a blog post.

I am however reading everyone's blogs through google reader on my phone. It's just really cumbersome to access comments from there an then tap one out on my phone keyboard!

Husband has for months suggested that we purchase a second computer, but I have been hesitant about spending the money. I am starting to come around, not only for the social aspects but also if I start doing some sort of business from home, I will need my own computer that I can use at my convenience, not his.

Family 2010

2010-01-03T11:21:00.001-08:00

How did that happen?

2009-12-28T14:29:00.000-08:00

I'm not quite sure how I've managed to go so long without posting. The holiday has been a mixed bag around here.

On the up side, Miss D had a wonderful time opening all of her gifts and was 100% on board the Santa train this year which was so much fun- not to mention a fabulous behavioral tool.

On the down side, I noticed her voice sounded funny. She never complained of pain and never had any other symptoms, but when I finally thought to look at her throat her tonsils were super swollen and covered in white junk. Husband took her to the doctor the day before Christmas Eve and the nurse practitioner said that if Miss D's tonsils got any bigger she would not be able to breathe.

!!!

So she got a prescription for steroids and woken up several times in the middle of the night as I checked on her to make sure she was still breathing.

On Christmas Day both Husband and baby started acting sick- albeit with completely different symptoms. Yesterday was the worst for baby. He was barely eating and had a terrible cough. A bunch of thick goo he couldn't get out. Last night it finally hit me. Nothing like caring for a sick baby when you feel like shit.

As of this afternoon we all seem to be on the mend. And I am just relieved that we are all relatively unscathed. There is nothing like a sick child to make you feel utterly helpless. ugh

Fried

2009-12-12T06:16:00.000-08:00

I wouldn't say I forgot, but it hasn't gotten any easier to parent an infant.

In case you were wondering.

The first time around it was hard because it was all new. You are scared that you might do something wrong. Although everyone told you you would get no sleep you had no idea what that actually meant, or how long it would take before you actually got to have a real sleep again. You worried about the babies weight gain, is it getting enough to eat, is it eliminating enough? And then there is the realization that your life is no longer your own. A concept you imagined before baby came but again, don't really comprehend until baby is there.

Second time around you don't have any of that stuff- or at least not as much. But lack of sleep is still no picnic. And of course, you now already have a child to take care of. Whereas before you might have been able to "sleep when the baby sleeps" (as everyone tells you) when you have another child to take care of you don't have that luxury. You also want to ensure that child #1 still gets plenty of your time and attention. There are new routines to learn. Getting two children bundled up for the winter cold and out to the car takes more time and more patience than one.

In both cases, as babies main food source there is very little freedom. Baby eats every 2-3 hours so that is your window of opportunity to do any chores, run errands or go anywhere. (Unless it is somewhere you can breastfeed comfortably)

There are still days when one looks up and it is 5pm and you haven't managed to take a shower. But at one month i can sort of see a light at the end of the tunnel. Baby is starting to go longer between feedings. And I hope to start pumping this week so we can introduce the bottle soon which should give me some more flexibility. Now if i can just figure out when and how I can pump...!

Then and Now

2009-12-10T07:23:00.000-08:00

When I had Miss D I knew exactly two other people with children - and they both had infants. What this meant was that anything we needed or wanted for her had to be purchased. This time around, tons of our friends are done having kids - and can't wait to get rid of their crap. To date I have received:

- An entire wardrobe for the boy from birth to age 4 (in exchange for Miss D's old clothes)
- 3 months worth of boob pads
- breastmilk bags (for pumping)
- bottles and nipples
- a super warm fleecy car seat baby cover thingy
- Four (count 'em, FOUR!) baby slings. none of which I seem to be able to use
- An exersaucer

Apologies if I've left out something you've given or lent me!

Amazing Measurements

2009-12-04T07:36:00.000-08:00

In two months- my daughter grew almost 2 inches.

Also, there is nothing like giving birth for immediate weight loss. 2 weeks after baby arrived I had lost 20 lbs! Even accounting for 8 lbs of baby and however many lbs of placenta and fluid that is pretty amazing.

I am actually back to the weight I was before I went on my big diet last year. So this adds to my illusion that I should be able to fit into some of my "bigger" clothes.

Sadly, my pelvic girdle, thighs and distended belly don't seem to have gotten the message yet that things are back to normal.

What? too much to ask for not even a month later?

Breastfeeding- the tide turning?

2009-12-03T06:36:00.000-08:00

Nearly 5 years ago when I had Miss Dukes the conventional wisdom on infant feeding was that breast is best. The AAP came out with a policy statement in 2005 saying the organization formally recommended breastfeeding over formula. The benefits ranged from better gastrointestinal health to studies that indicated breastfed babies in general had higher IQs than children that were not breastfed.

In fact, many publications seemed to insinuate that by not breastfeeding you were probably hindering your child's development- and maybe even doing your child harm by not giving them the best possible nutrients! For me, breastfeeding with Miss D was pretty straightforward. We both got the hang of it right away. But many moms I know agonized over breastfeeding. Spent months and dollars trying gadgets and lactation consultants. And if in the end they were unable to breastfeed successfully, they most likely felt guilty about it. Or worse, felt that they were not good mothers because of it.

I always felt pretty good about breastfeeding Miss D for 9 months. (a bit guilty we didn't make the recommended full 12, but the decision to wean was a mutual one.) When i was asked at the hospital what I wanted to do I replied that I would be breastfeeding, of course! And all the nurses and the pediatrician we saw at the hospital mentioned that since I did fine with the first baby the second one should be a piece of cake.

BUT, it seems to me like there has been in a change in the air for healthcare providers. Apparently in the past couple of years there have been some studies showing that breastmilk does not provide enough of certain vitamins- in particular vitamin D. (Vitamin D, is apparently not actually a vitamin, was misclassified as such in the 20's or something. Anyway, it is naturally processed by human skin from sunlight. The reason breastmilk does not contain enough is due to our lifestyle change of using lots of sunblock and not spending time in the sun.) So now the recommendation is that breastfed babies should be supplemented with vitamin D to avoid rickets and other health issues.

At the hospital, when my baby was only 6-7 hours old, i commented to one of the nurses who came to take my vitals that the baby seemed to be feeding a lot. Her response was "maybe he needs formula". Which just sort of shocked me. I mean the baby was just born! And everyone knows that breastmilk doesn't come in for 3-4 days. I just feel like back in 2005 NO ONE would have recommended formula- formula was seen as a last resort. LAST RESORT. 3 days later we took baby to the pediatrician's office. The doctor was concerned at the babies weight loss (normal for babies to lose weight in first week) and immediately recommended that we start supplementing. (giving a newborn a bottle that early often causes nipple confusion and can make breastfeeding more difficult or even impossible if the baby prefers the easier bottle nipples) Even though I was unsure as to whether my milk had come in yet. I ended up checking with a lactation consultant and decided to wait another day and he ended up gaining just fine on my breastmilk. Then at our last appointment we were told about the supplementation.

A friend of mine who has a 5 month old and 2 other previously breastfed children also noticed a change at her doctor's office. When the doc asked how she was feeding the baby and she told the doc proudly she was breastfeeding exclusively- she felt sort of shut down when the doc said she would need to vitamin supplement.

I wouldn't be surprised if in a few years the new recommendation will be to feed some breastmilk and some formula, before the pendulum swings the other way completely!

Om Namah Shivaya

2009-11-28T10:06:00.000-08:00

My religious upbringing was a mixed bag. My Father was born and raised Jewish. My Mother was born and raised Mennonite. Both chose to look for other spiritual paths in their 20's. My mom looked around for a while. There was a Unitarian church she attended when we lived in MD, but she didn't like any of the practices she visited in Albuquerque. I think she is still a spiritual person even though she is not affiliated with a particular faith at the moment.

My dad on the other hand started following Siddha Yoga before my birth and still does to this day. When I was young there was a yoga center in our town he would attend occasionally, now I think his practices are mostly personal.

As children and young adults my sisters and i were never forced to attend any services. But as we got older and more curious we were encouraged to visit the religious centers of my parents and even friends. Free to make our own choices.

For a while in my pre-teen and teen (?) years i became very interested in Siddha Yoga. I went to the local yoga center with my father. I even went to a 2 week intensive in upstate NY where I saw the guru herself. There's not a lot I've kept with me from those days. I remember i loved the chanting part best. I cannot smell nag champa incense without being drawn back to that white carpeted finished basement of someone's house. The sound of Indian instruments playing.

The only thing i use is a mantra: Om Namah Shivaya. This loosely translates to "I honor the divinity within myself". When I was taught how to meditate, I was told to think this mantra on each inhale and each exhale. This was one method to quiet the mind and get to the divinity part of meditation.

Needless to say, I have never been very good at meditating. I am unable to get to that point where my mind ceases it's never ending stream of chatter. But i still use this method to relax myself in many situations. Times of great stress or emotion. Times of great pain. (Hello labor!) And recently, every single moment of the day or night when I am able to catch a few hours of sleep. When my overtired brain wants to run in a million different directions, about 10 minutes of repeating the mantra on each inhale and exhale slows my breathing and quiets my brain.

Oddly enough I had forgotten the meaning until yesterday when I asked my Dad. I don't know that I'm any closer to reaching Nirvana, but the sleep is surely blissful.

Update on Baby Life

2009-11-22T09:11:00.000-08:00

I definitely feel like I am in much better shape mentally this time around. I remember distinctly around the 2 week point with Miss D having a total mental breakdown. Now we did have the added stress of having just moved in to a new house, and the fact that parenthood was totally new and we were so concerned about doing something wrong or harmful in addition to the lack of sleep. But on Monday, Bubba will be 2 weeks old and i actually feel like we are reaching a bit of a groove. (subject to change at any time of course!) i don't know if I have just adjusted to the lack of sleep or if I am doing a better job of catching naps when I have the opportunity.

I also suspect that Bubba may be sleeping more/better at night than Miss D did because I am having him sleep on me. (With Miss D i was too afraid I would squish her) Or maybe he is just pretty good with his days/nights. He tends to be more alert during the day and for the past week anyway between 12AM-7AM he goes right back to sleep after feedings. (Approx. every 2 hours but sometimes up to 3)

I am amazed by the rapidity of my stomach shrinking. maybe it is because I have a 4 1/2 year old daily marking the progress of my belly button from outie to innie, but I don't remember shrinking down this fast last time. (Or maybe I was just too out of it to be aware) This has led to some rather ambitious clothing choices on my part. I did try to fit into a bigger pair of my regular pants the other day. (Not ready.) And a bigger shirt yesterday (quite tight). Methinks i will be in elastic waists for a while yet but i may raid my "regular" closet for some shirts. Can you tell I am sick of maternity clothes?

We all knew it would be different when the baby came, we just didn't know how it would be different. Honestly, most of my thoughts were about Miss D, and I didn't even consider how husband and I would need to change to account for another being in the house. One thing that is becoming clear- with a one child house there is always the chance that one of you will have a break while the other one is amusing the child. That is a luxury we will no longer have. We have definitely benefited from my Mother being here and I am a little afraid to see what's going to happen when she leaves.... ;( But on the other hand, we have to figure it out sometime!

Miss D herself is not displaying any jealousy. If anything she is sometimes too affectionate. She always wants to touch and hold and kiss him. And she likes to do this at inopportune times like when he is sleeping or eating. (OK that is what he is doing most of the time so i guess I have to cut her some slack there) As time goes on and also when mom leaves i think the reality of the changed situation will settle in more. She has been a bit more whiny of late, but she also has a cold so it's hard to say what is causing it.

Starting Dec 1, she will be going to school Monday, Wednesday and Fridays. Until now, she has had a class on her off days (Gymnastics or Ballet). This has been great because i make sure she is getting some physical activity each day and also breaks up the day for both of us. Unfortunately, the park district does not offer any classes the entire month of December. Which means that every tuesday and thursday it will be all me with both kids...*titters nervously*

So Tired- No surprises

2009-11-18T18:45:00.000-08:00

Needless to say, I have been short on time and brainpower and the ability to form a cohesive sentence let alone blog entry seems to elude me.

I have been so fortunate to have my mother here to allow me to nap.

The Most Uneventful Birth that Ever Was

2009-11-14T06:50:00.000-08:00

Baby's birth was about the most pleasant experience modern medicine can provide. If you can even imagine using such a word to describe childbirth.

The only snaffu came when we arrived promptly at 6am and found out that my medical records had not made it downstairs so the induction could not start until after 9am when my Dr.'s office opened. After a mere 4 hours, and 2 IV bags later, things finally got started with the pitocin.

I had heard a lot of bad things about pitocin. Mainly that the contractions are much more painful than naturally occurring labor pains. For me, they were not that bad. Perhaps this was because I was already 3cm and 70% effaced, so the pitocin was just giving me a little nudge. They started me on a very small amount and then gradually increased it. When I started feeling the contractions getting more painful i asked for the epidural. I didn't have to wait too long for it. And then I was feeling no pain.

Around the time I hit transition I really started feeling some pain so I begged for some more medication and I got a super dose. Like, could not move my own legs dose. And I was feeling nothing. What seemed like an hour or so later my doctor came in to check me and said "Oh! There's the baby's head. Let's get started!" I was shocked because i was not even feeling the urge to push. I had had an epidural with Miss D but I definitely felt a lot of pressure and an intense need to push when it was pushing time. My doctor reassured me that the fact that i didn't feel the urge to push was great because then i wouldn't feel anything with the birth.

And she was right. It was kind of surreal actually. Everyone is telling me to push and I was doing my best to push and the whole time I'm thinking "Am i pushing? I hope I'm pushing because I'm really not sure what's going on down there..." But i guess I was doing fine because he came out on the 4th contraction. Beating Miss D's record of a mere 10 minutes of pushing.

They put him right on top of me as they were cutting the cord, which was nice because i hadn't gotten to see Miss D until she was cleaned up.

If Husband and i hadn't been in the room and had seen him put on top of me I think we might have been concerned that we got the right baby. He's a redhead! In sunlight it looks almost strawberry blond and with all the lanolin and darker light it looks more reddish-brown. His eyelashes and eyebrows are so fair they are transparent. The eyes are baby blue of course, but I can't tell if they are going to darken or not. Of course there is plenty of time for it to change, but it was just such a shock.

With Miss D when she was born, there was argument as to which of us she resembled more. With Bubba (working nickname- per husband) we look at him and wonder where he came from!* Ah the mysteries of genetics.

I will try to tell more about his first week home and how we are all adjusting as the week goes on.

*Of course there is something to trace it back to. My mom is a redhead with blue eyes and per Husband's Dad his paternal grandmother had red-headed siblings.

Baby Soon

2009-11-06T07:11:00.000-08:00

At the doc yesterday she pronounced that she would be surprised if I made it until Monday without going into labor, but if I did, would I like to be induced on Monday morning?

Hellz yeah!

After three weeks of little sleep and constant, painful contractions I'm about ready to reach up there and pull out the baby with my bare hands. Ha ha!

No. I am serious.

Luckily, my mom was able to get a ticket here and flies in today so now we will save on babysitter fees too.

Leaves

2009-11-04T09:03:00.000-08:00

Disturbing

2009-11-03T08:58:00.000-08:00

This package has been open and sitting on a coffee table in the playroom since Sunday.*

*I feel i must say that this is probably the 3rd McD meal Miss D has ever had- and it was mainly because she wanted the My Little Pony Toy. It was a reward for helping rake leaves.

Miss D Halloween 2009

2009-11-01T06:54:00.001-08:00

UPDATED- Now right side up! (Thanks Shawn! Are you sure you don't work for Google? ;)

BOO!

2009-10-30T08:07:00.000-07:00

Pointless Contractions Suck

2009-10-29T11:58:00.000-07:00

This week has been all about a bunch of Braxton Hicks crappadoo. I did not have any of this nonsense with my first pregnancy.

Braxton Hicks - for those of you who have never had the pleasure- are actual contractions but they are "unproductive". Meaning they are uncomfortable and or painful but don't contribute to actually having a goddamn baby.

Here's how the week has gone so far:

Friday Night: Woken at 3AM by pain. Lasts about an hour. Go downstairs and watch TV. Is this it? What needs to be done? an hour later realize i am falling asleep on the couch and go back to bed.

Saturday Afternoon: They're baaaack. This time i am not so easily fooled. Lie on the couch grumpy.

Monday Night: Woken up intermittently with pains through the night, but manage to go back to sleep each time.

Tuesday Most of the Day: They occur on and off for most of the day. I allow myself to get a little excited when they seem to be getting more painful and i take a long walk thinking they will either stop or progress. Sadly, it is eventually the former.

Tuesday Night: Woken by them at 1AM very sharp. (But not labor sharp, you mommies know what I mean) Toss and turn waiting to see if they are going to go anywhere. "This is a terrible time....We will have to get out the air mattress for the sitter......Can you wait a few more hours baby?....Oh nevermind, just please come now and let's get this over with!" 1 hour later they have stopped but I am too hyped up to sleep so go downstairs to watch TV for a while.

By yesterday, the lack of sleep and discomfort not to mention all the hormones have combined to make one very grumpy pregnant woman. The thought of having to endure this for another 2 weeks was.....fill in the blank.

Blessedly, i have been given a reprieve and haven't had any bad bouts since Tuesday night. I actually got a full (pregnancy*) nights sleep last night. And that's good because according to the doctor today there hasn't been any change since last week. Sighz.

*meaning still waking up every couple of hours to pee or turn myself over

Comfort=Baked Pasta

2009-10-27T18:22:00.000-07:00

I rarely made recipes that take hours and hours when I was working full time. The thought of making a large batch of something time-consuming and then freezing it for future meals was pleasant in the abstract. But when the precious hours of the weekend are in front of you...I was more apt to spend them with my child and family than to want to devote big chunks of time to the kitchen.

As I wait for these interminable last days of pregnancy to pass, it is a good time to take advantage of Miss D's school days and make these labor-intensive (and freezable!) dishes. I've made potstickers and soup. My favorites have got to be the baked pastas though. Last week I made lasagne and this week I plan to make mac & cheese.

If you are going to the trouble of making lasagne, you might as well make the marinara. A BIG BATCH of marinara. Thanks to the Costco vat-o-san marziano whole tomatoes. I have enough sauce here for the lasagne + 1 additional baked pasta or two other dishes. I keep it really simple here. Just a little garlic and onion softened before adding the tomatoes and fresh herbs (basil and oregano) at then end- and seasoning of course.

Although I enjoy italian sausage, i am still squeamish about meat hidden in things. My favorite lasagne filling is one that an italian friend wrote down for me years ago (actually she taught me to make lasagne, period). Ricotta, parmesan, fresh garlic and a package of frozen chopped spinach thawed and squeezed. maybe a little fresh herbs too.

Let us not get too crazy here. If a shortcut is to be made, this is the one to do. No-boil noodles cook up just as delicious as boiled ones. (A trick from the italian friend ;)

Lots and lots of mozzarella cheese. Parmesan too. (not pictured)

Then the layering process begins. A thin layer of sauce. A layer of noodles. Another layer of sauce.

Dot on the filling...

Press with fingers to cover the surface area.

Cover with cheese (both kinds)

Repeat: Sauce, noodle, sauce, filling, cheese

I usually get 2 full layers. After the last cheese layer, One more Sauce, noodle, sauce round before covering the top with cheese.

Cover with foil and into a 375 degree oven for 45 mins. Take the foil off and bake another 15-20 mins until the top browns.

Because there are only 3 of us. I always make two separate pans, one for now and one for later. I usually cook both at the same time, taking the freezer one out after 45 mins. That way, the frozen one only has to be reheated- not defrosted and then cooked.

Everyone Loves a Parade

2009-10-26T19:04:00.000-07:00

One of Miss D's school friends invited her to go to a neighborhood Halloween parade over the weekend. It was about 3 blocks, had a million children, adults and dogs in costumes and there was trick-or-treating at all the local businesses afterwards.

I am a sucker for a marching band in general. But a marching band dressed as zombies and playing "Thriller"? Irresistible.

Here is a shot of Miss D's costume (and my giant belly). She chose to be a Lightning Bug this year. Thank goodness her Grandma Sandy came to the rescue and made it this year! On her back is the light-up butt which is a Tupperware filled with glow-sticks. Unfortunately they don't do much in the daytime. i am thinking for her school Halloween party about sticking my bike light in there instead. It is red- but it blinks!

Fun With Pipecleaners

2009-10-26T12:19:00.000-07:00

Goddammit

2009-10-24T16:45:00.000-07:00

nothing like a little Braxton Hicks at 2:45 in the morning to get the blood pumping.

or in the afternoon....

Let the Countdown Commence

2009-10-22T18:47:00.000-07:00

For those of you not on the Facebook, at the doctor today i learned i am now:

2cm dilated
60% effaced

In laymans turns that means that i am all ready to go at any time. Could be tonight, could be 3 weeks from now.

*sighz heavily*

Still Sleeping

2009-10-21T07:00:00.000-07:00

It is 9AM and my daughter is still asleep.

It started over the weekend. She woke up at 4:30AM and i put her back to bed and she slept till 10! Monday she slept till 9:30 (I woke her up). Yesterday and toay she woke up at 6:30 Am and asked to come in our bed. I let her sleep with us yesterday and we were up at 7:30. Today i put her back in her own bed and she is still sleeping. She has been going to bed at her normal time. And nothing else has changed.

Of course, i cannot just sit back an be grateful and appreciative at this turn of events. Instead i am worried that she is ill or something else sinister is at work.

She HAS pretty much stopped taking naps. Ever. Even at school. - So that could be a factor
She HAS had a cold for the past two weeks, which has reduced to a lingering cough mostly in the morning and at night for the past week- So that could be a factor (no other symptoms though)
She could be going through a growth spurt?

Ultragrain Follow Up

2009-10-20T19:10:00.000-07:00

To answer comments from yesterday:

Kegz- yes, the cookies i brought did have ultragrain flour. Vive la ultragrain!

Lisa- It actually comes in 2 10lb bags (which may still outweigh your dogs) but yes it is a buttload of flour.

RM(And anyone else who's interested)- A rep from the PR firm that hypes Ultragrain visited my post yesterday and left a comment with some more information about the product. She also left contact info if you have more questions.

Ultragrain

2009-10-19T16:08:00.000-07:00

Husband convinced me to buy this flour the other day. It was available at Costco- $12 for a whopping 20 lbs. 20 lbs may seem like a lot of flour- and it is!- but I have been doing a lot more baking since I've been at home and at nearly a 1/4 of the price of my regular All Purpose (AP) flour per pound....it seemed worth the gamble.

What is ultragrain flour? As near as I can tell from my google searches and the company website, it is some sort of patented processing for whole wheat flour that keeps the nutrients while having more of the appearance and usability of white AP flour. Similar to "white whole wheat" flours on the market. (I have only played around with King Arthur brand) You will probably need to click on the picture to read the ingredients list.
The ingredients are unbleached flour and unbleached "ultragrain" flour (whole-wheat flour). I like the idea of my baked goods having a bit more nutritious value on a regular basis so I was eager to see what kind of results I'd get.

The flour is somewhat golden in color. It also seems to have a bit more moisture in it than regular AP flour. Here is my review as used in the following applications:

No-Knead Bread: This was the first thing I made with it and arguably where the difference was most dramatic. The crust of the bread was comparable to AP flour. The interior was definitely a golden color. The flavor had an aftertaste to it that I wasn't expecting. Not quite wheaty, not quite white. After making it twice i was still unsure how I felt about it. I think maybe next time I will try half Ultragrain and half bread flour.

Corn muffins: Perhaps because half of the flour in a corn muffin is cornmeal - I really couldn't tell any difference.

Biscuits: After making the bread I wasn't sure how these would turn out- but they were delicious! No strange aftertaste at all. Baked up as light and flaky as any AP would. A big hit with everyone.

Cookies: Specifically, Oatmeal, Pecan and Chocolate Chip cookies. The cookies came out perfect and delicious. And hello? With both oatmeal and whole wheat flour I can call them healthy cookies right?

I should say that I did not do any side-by-side comparisons or anything, so my impressions are purely based on memory of what these recipes should taste like. But truthfully, it doesn't matter if things taste exactly the same, it only matters that they taste good. So in that respect i think the ultragrain is a winner. And so are me and my family, what with our more nutritious baked goods and all.

36 Weeks and 2 Days

2009-10-16T12:58:00.000-07:00

Baby has dropped. (which I could have told you a few days ago when I started feeling pain in my butt bone and random sharp pains in my hip sockets)

31 lbs gained.
1 cm dilated

Doc said maybe early November, but i was dilated at 36 weeks with miss D and she was only 2 days early so I'm not getting too excited.

Starting to swell up like a balloon. (Hello double chin! There you are fat fingers!)

Baby size is normal. Everything is perfect, perfect, perfect.

Shower Power

2009-10-13T19:07:00.000-07:00

All of a sudden last week Miss D decided that she didn't want to take baths anymore- she wants to take showers.

If this turns out to not be a passing phase i will probably need to invest in a shower cap for her, especially as the weather is getting cold!

My question is this: at what age is it appropriate to let a child take a shower unsupervised? As of now, we are letting her stay in there by herself as long as the door is open so we can hear if she falls down or something. But the bathroom does get really cold in the winter and she would prefer to shut the bathroom door. (Probably because that's what Husband and I do)

So am I being overprotective or reasonable here?

Risotto Addendum

2009-10-12T19:43:00.000-07:00

Just a few notes about risotto...

- SRM asked how much a cup of grain yields when cooked. This is a little challenging to quantify as your total volume of risotto is effected by how much of a main ingredient you add. In general I think this quantity will serve 4 normal adult appetites as a main dish. Risotto is not a "light" meal. My family ALWAYS has leftovers. (I can't speak to your husband's appetite, but it may be worth it to make this amount to start before doubling it!)

- Risotto DOES NOT freeze well (homemade anyway). So, not something to make a huge quantity of for later meals in the week. I happen to enjoy the consistency of leftover risotto. (It will seize up) But an even better way to use it is to turn it into a second meal. Add one beaten egg, more cheese maybe some scallions and form into slim patties. Fry in a little olive oil until brown and crispy on both sides and serve with a little salad on the side. Or if patties are too much work, just fry up the leftovers in a little oil. Italian fried rice!

Risotto Anytime

2009-10-11T19:11:00.001-07:00

Everyone has their "go to" recipes or methodologies for weeknight meals. I've shared a few of mine here such as panzanella and fried rice. It may surprise you to know that risotto is on that list. I think there is a misconception that risotto is time-consuming and difficult to do properly.

Here's the thing, it does take about 20 mins of uninterrupted time at the stovetop, stirring. It is definitely not something you can throw in the oven and walk away from. But depending on your ingredients, your prep may only take 10 minutes so you are looking at 30 minutes of cooking time total. Same as a stir fry or pasta. And I find the stirring to be therapeutic. A good time to think about the days events, zone out or (ahem) read a book or magazine in your other hand. (paperback recommended) Even when I was working it was something I made often on the weeknights.

I made this sweet mama squash and bacon risotto a few nights ago and took pics, but I thought I would describe the general methodology to you if you want to play along at home.

Here is what you will need:

- an aromatic of some kind. Shallot is traditional. I rarely have shallots but I always have onions so that's what I use most of the time. You could also include garlic (in addition to an oniony thing or alone), ramps, leek, etc.

- 1 cup A short, starchy grain. Arborio rice is traditional. Barley works great and is a healthyish alternative (although you can no longer call it risotto). I've read recipes that used short grain brown rice but have never tried it.

- 1/4 cup A mild flavored alcohol. Dry white wine is traditional and preferred. In a pinch I have used sherry and dry vermouth. I bet sake would work. If your other flavor components are strong enough to stand up to them, cognac or red wine might be doable. (i have made it skipping this step and it is not worth it! The end result is very bland)

- 5-6 cups liquid. You can't go wrong with chicken stock. Veggie stock is good too. You can use water, although it is better if you can flavor the water a little. For example, if you are using a fresh vegetable you can blanch the vegetable in the water, or for a shrimp risotto take the tails/shells off shrimp and boil them in the water for a few minutes. For a heavier ingredient you might be able to use veal or beef stock but I can't vouch for either of them.

- something to put in the risotto. In the spring i might do fresh asparagus. In the fall pumpkin or mushrooms. Frozen peas and shrimp work great anytime individually or together. you are limited only by your imagination!

- 2 tablespoons of butter. Unsalted preferably. The recipe for the risotto i made below called for marscapone which i'm sure would have been wonderful if I had had any.

- sharp italian cheese. Parmesan of course. Pecarino Romano. anything like that. As much as you and your family like.

Ok. this is what you do:

1. Heat your liquid in a pot. Recipes usually call anywhere from 4-6 cups of liquid for a cup of grain. I usually try to have 6 cups on hand although I often don't use it all. The organic chicken stock I buy at Costco comes in quart containers. I know it can be a little salty so i will usually use water if it goes beyond that and everything works out hunky dory. Once the liquid is heated turn the burner down low to keep it warm during the cooking.

2. While the liquid is heating, pre-cook your main ingredients. This could mean blanching vegetables or shrimp in your heated liquid. Or sauteing mushrooms in the pan you will be cooking the risotto in. The risotto i made in these pictures is a little unusual in that the main ingredient was cooked along with the rice. Most of the time you will want to at least partially cook your main ingredient and then it will be added at the end of the cooking process to be warmed through.

Here you see my warmed chicken stock. In the risotto pan i am crisping some bacon. (The bacon will be added at the end)

3. Take a (preferably nonstick) wide pan. Add a couple of tablespoons of olive oil or butter (or one of each) and heat over moderate heat. Add your aromatics and cook until clarified.

In this case, I used the bacon fat left in the pan and added my main ingredient, sweet mama squash at the same time as the aromatic.

4. Add the grain and toast for about 2 minutes. Stir to get all of the grains coated in the fat.

5. Add the wine (or whatever alcohol your using) and let the stirring begin!

6. Stir, stir, stir until the liquid is completely absorbed. As you can see in the pic below, the rice is already releasing some of its' starch. On its' way to becoming creamy risotto!

7. Start adding your heated liquid to the risotto pan, one ladleful at a time. Stir each ladle of liquid until it is completely absorbed. The constant stirring is vital because otherwise the grains will not absorb the liquid at the same rate. You will end up with half cooked rice and half crunchy. Not good.

It will take about 20 minutes to fully cook the grain. This pic is taken about halfway through and you can see that "fully absorbed" takes on a different meaning is the starch continues to release.

8. After about 20 minutes or 4 cups of liquid have been absorbed (whichever comes first) Add your main ingredient and start taste-testing the rice for doneness. This is completely to your preference. The rice will continue to soften somewhat after you stop adding liquid. I generally stop once the rice has no definite crunchiness but there is still some resistance. If the rice is still crunchy I add more liquid, stir till absorbed and then do another test.

9. Adjust consistency. After many risottos, I know my family prefers it on the soupy side. You may like it more dense. Just as the rice will continue to cook after you take it off the heat, the risotto will continue to thicken slightly as well. To get it perfect for us, when the rice is done to my liking I add one more ladle of liquid and cook it for just a minute before...

10. Turn off the heat and add your butter. Stir until all gone.

11. Add cheese and stir until all gone. If you're unsure of how much you like, start with about 1/2 a cup grated and then you can add more if you want

12. Plate that bitch up! a little something on top is always nice. Maybe some fresh chopped parsley, or just a little more shavings of parmesan, or you know...BACON.

If you don't make it already, i hope you'll try it soon!

Ow

2009-10-08T07:57:00.000-07:00

At my last doctor visit, the doc told me that if I hadn't experienced it already, i could expect to feel some cramping and pressure in the near future. This is apparently common in subsequent pregnancies.

With my first pregnancy I never felt anything until I had some Braxton Hicks the week before she actually showed up. As I hadn't felt anything up to that point i wasn't too concerned. But it showed up a few days ago.

It doesn't happen very often, but twice they have woken me out of a deep sleep. It feels like a low-level labor pain. Well I say low level, but it is obviously enough to wake me up! Then i lay there in the dark for a while freaking out that I may be going into pre-term labor.

Stupid body getting ready for birth.

On the other hand, I had completely forgotten what labor pains felt like. The first time this happened I was like "Ohhhhhh yeahhhhh, NOW I remember". Remember why I'll be getting an epidural that is.

The Corner Store

2009-10-05T17:05:00.000-07:00

One thing I love about living in a bustling metropolis is that you are never far from a corner store. ("Bodega" for those of you in NYC)

My favorite corner store is located one block east and has most anything I could need at a moment's notice, cooking-wise anyway. It is clean and well maintained, the proprietors are always pleasant and the prices are cheap.

It is comforting to know that if i start cooking something and suddenly realize i need:

garlic
a lemon
an onion
milk
eggs
etc.

I can pick it up in less than a 5 minute walk from my front door. And if I'm out of cash I will most likely be able to raid the change jar for enough money to pay for the small thing I need.

I think more often than not, if I had to get in car to make these purchases I would probably end up scrapping my project.

34 Weeks (Can you believe there are 6 more to go?!)

2009-10-03T18:47:00.000-07:00

Stick a fork in me. i am done. For realz.

You know you are ready when you are no longer scared about the pain of labor.

Of course, baby really needs 2 more weeks to be full term. And there are no signs that baby has any interest in coming out. I'm just saying - I'm ready!

In addition to all the delights of 3rd trimester that I have already been regaling you with, i am now seeing the recurrence of a number of first trimester symptoms:

- Soooooooooo tired. Even when I do nothing most of the day.
- Reflux (hello acid my old friend)
- Difficulty swallowing pills)
- Nausea when I need to eat

There are still many things to do to prepare for baby's arrival. But there is (sigh) plenty of time to do it.

Too Bad so Sad

2009-10-02T08:51:00.000-07:00

No Olympics for Chicago!

And first one out so...double ouch.

I have to say i was pretty ambivalent about the whole thing- although I suspected that taxpayers would end up holding the bag at the end.

So I guess it's a good thing.

Science at home

2009-09-30T12:34:00.000-07:00

Now that Miss D is in school part-time I have been making an effort to put her on more of a regular schedule on the days she is home. This has so far been beneficial for me as well as her! It makes the days go by a lot faster when we have activities to look forward to. I am not super rigid in my scheduling so there is leeway for errands or for when plans need to change. But I'm hoping this will make the transition to having a baby present easier for her. (I just need to get the grandparents to stick with it when they are here to help! ;)

I really want to make sure she is not missing out on any learning by not being in school full time. I should probably break down and buy a kindergarten curriculum - but there are a lot of resources online for free too. Last week we did a couple of science experiments based on the chemical reaction between baking soda and vinegar. You may recall this is what makes the paper mache volcano's erupt from your own school days. As it so happens, the carbon dioxide release will also inflate a balloon!

i always feel like somebody's watching meeeeee

2009-09-28T18:36:00.000-07:00

Once I had been blogging for a while I installed a stat counter. There are many different pieces of information compiled including how many people visit your site and what posts they look at. This is nice for the blogger who only gets a few comments per post and you wonder if anyone out there is PAYING ATTENTION.

One of the things you can track is what keywords might lead a new reader to your page, say through a search engine. Sometimes these things are funny. Mostly they are innocuous. Toeless socks is one I get a lot.

Every so often I get searched by my name, which is always a little strange. Because, you know, who is looking for me?

Maddening.

First Ballet Class

2009-09-25T18:44:00.001-07:00

Naming

2009-09-23T05:43:00.000-07:00

Choosing a name for a child is one of the most challenging things in the world. After all, a name is one's identity. And although a child may decide to change their name at some point, it won't be for a while. The name you pick is what will define them during their childhood years.

Husband and I chose names for both out children well in advance of their birth. We narrowed it down to a couple of names we both like and then sat on it for a while. With this one (for sure) and probably Miss D too (I don't quite remember) I eventually started referring to the baby by one of the names in my mind. Like when he was moving around, or having the hiccups, or won't let me sleep. Instead of thinking "Settle down, baby" I would think "Settle down, So-and-So" and ultimately this is the name we go with.

I've had some friends who chose names before their babies were even conceived. And others who waited until the baby came out to see which one fit. Some people tell everyone the name the chose in advance of the birth. Others hold it a close secret.

If you have kids, how did you decide?

32 weeks- keep on chugging

2009-09-19T07:45:00.000-07:00

Actually I thought I was at 32 weeks last week. So for some reason I was a little disappointed when the nurse at the doctor's office said i was 31 weeks and 4 days. (On Wednesday) sighz.

Baby brain has kicked in something fierce. I went to Costco solo the other day (Husband was sick). I got a number of heavy items so I asked for someone to help me to the car. then I got out in the parking lot and couldn't remember exactly where I parked it! Thank god I didn't make the poor guy follow me all over the place, it was only a row over. Still. Embarrassing.

I then proceeded to scrape the hell out of the wheel well on the car trying to get it in the garage.

I am also turning into an emotional basket case. I think I have cried almost every day this week over such things as:

- concern over Husband
- kindness of friends
- baby brain (see above)

Very tired. Very uncomfortable. Very thankful I am at home! I keep trying to remember what it was like at this stage with Miss D and I was still at work. I'm sure it was hell.

Someone takes after their Grandpa...

2009-09-17T08:35:00.000-07:00

On the way to school this morning Miss D said:

"Remember when we went to the pig roast the other day? I ate the eyeball and it was good."

Last year she had been disappointed when the eyeballs melted. This year they were still there and I did put one on her plate per her request but she and her (second) cousin ate in the playhouse and I never saw what happened.

Per Husband, she did!

Pig Roasting

2009-09-15T18:38:00.000-07:00

What a wonderful weekend we had. It was so nice to get out of town and away from all our troubles for a little while.

My Aunt B and her DH (Uncle G.)very graciously put us up at their home in Homerville, OH. The property is surrounded by farms and woodland. I was very excited to see how entertaining is done in the country. Apparently- it is on a mass scale! In addition to all of their friends and relations, Uncle G. went around and invited all the neighbors resulting in an estimated attendance of well over 100 people!

Husband started the day by getting up at the crack of dawn to help put the 130 lb pig into the assembly. (this is well documented in my coverage of last year's pig roast) I spent the later part of the morning helping to get tables set up in the garage for pot luck but by early afternoon we were able to take a kite flying break.

Miss Dukes and the cows next door.

Husband and I took turns playing parking attendant. He is easily identified by the official-looking orange vest. (Vest is Aunt B.'s for when she walks in the woods during deer season!)

The pig takes a little longer to cook than anticipated. Luckily, there is a ton of food! (amazingly, the only things left at the end of the night are a few store-bought baked goods)

The finished piggie, lovingly attended most of the day by both my husband and Cousin-in-law A.

This is a very large group of very happy diners.
After dinner, my cousin S got busy getting everyone playing a huge assortment of lawn games including bocce, volleyball, cornhole and badminton. As the sun went down and so did the temperature the evening ended, as I've learned these things often do, with a bonfire and s'mores.

What a great day. Big props to my Aunt and Uncle for pulling off such a wonderful event and for letting us be a part of it.

Out of Dodge

2009-09-11T05:49:00.000-07:00

We are leaving town today for a few days in beautiful, rural Ohio. If you are on the Podolny-Goertzen blog continuum you have probably heard tell that there is a pig roast going on. Last years event was a smaller, family affair. This year the guest list is up to 140!

I have been looking forward to this trip for months. I can't wait to spend time with family, have a few surprises, a little relaxation and a visit with an old friend.

Tell you all about it next week!

Fantasy

2009-09-08T18:00:00.000-07:00

My sisters and I grew up on a diet of Fantasy and Science Fiction novels, courtesy of my Father's collection. I probably read them most in middle school, around the time I discovered Stephen King. They were the first "adult" novels I read and many of them were series. The most memorable to me were:

Piers Anthony- The "Xanth" series (I remember that books 1-7 or 9 were pretty good and then I lost interest) and the Incarnations of Immortality series

David Eddings- The Belgariad (series of 3)

Orson Scott Card- Ender's Game (at the time only the first two books were available, or maybe that's all Dad had) and the Tales of Alvin Maker series

Robert A. Heinlein- Stranger in a Strange Land (probably pretty obvious why that one appealed to a teen or pre-teen)

Dad has since moved on to other preferred reading material. World history mostly, which is not so big of a leap when you consider that most Fantasy and Sci-Fi has elaborate historical backgrounds that they use to create their worlds. I did too. Lots of biographies, "straight" fiction of all kinds, mysteries and suspense...

At our last bookclub, our newest member mentioned that she had hoped that joining the club would expose her to types of books she hadn't read before, such as Fantasy. It made me think HOW LONG it's been since I've read any (Harry Potter excepted). So I went on an internet search for fantasy books that would appeal to non-fantasy readers. (Bookclub did have a bad experience when we ventured into the horror category. We read I am Legend by Richard Matheson , a book considered to be superlative in the genre, and we all hated it. My literary tastes may have changed since I was 12...) I found a couple I am working my way through. The very first being The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss.

Wow.

It has been a long time since I couldn't put a book down like this! Like to the point where i was neglecting my motherly duties. ("Play by yourself honey, Mommy's reading") Now I'm not going to say it is the best written book in the world. But the characters are well drawn, the world is fascinating and you can tell that there is a lot of set up going on for future books.

Which brings me to the sadness. When I picked this book I didn't realize it was part of a series. I'd forgotten how enjoyable it is to read a fictional series. (Series not serial) Where you are racing through one book and it is so absorbing that you can't wait to get to the next one. The sadness is that the other two books HAVEN'T BEEN WRITTEN YET. Boo!

The fact that it's a series means it's inappropriate for bookclub, it's rather long for bookclub too so I'll keep looking. But I'm curious as to whether anyone has any good recommendations for Fantasy or Sci-Fi series for my own personal use? Book club recs would be great too!

A Big Girl's Room

2009-09-04T19:20:00.000-07:00

A big girl gets to choose her own paint colors. In this case, two shades of purple.

A big girl needs lots of space to organize all her books and toys. (especially the ones with small parts that baby brothers should not be around)

A big girl needs to have a princess bed with pink netting. (Her new favorite game is "sleep" and so it was $20 well spent)

A big girl can choose pink butterflies for her walls and put them on herself.

30 Weeks and all is well

2009-09-02T19:00:00.000-07:00

I had a doctor's appointment yesterday and going forward i will be visiting the office every 2 weeks instead of every month. Already.

Seems like the end of this pregnancy is sneaking up on me!

Over the past few weeks I have noticed things are definitely becoming harder for me.
-Every time I walk up the stairs i am out of breath.
-Most changes in body position are accompanied by a grunt.
-And bending down is a definite chore.
-A bit of the acid reflux has come back in the form of mild burping.
- I wake up a few times a night to pee or change position, but haven't felt like I have been losing too much sleep of late. (thank goodness!)

According to the doctor, everything at this stage of the game looks perfect, from fetal movement, to measuring, to my weight gain. (So i am feeling less guilty about the ice cream i have started eating nightly. hee hee)

Miss D started going back to school this week (2 days) which has been really nice. Both in allowing me to get things done and letting me rest and relax a little. Now that she is settled in her new room, (post on that soon!) we are starting to get things ready for the baby in earnest. Today i will be cleaning out the remnants of her old room and looking through ALL the baby things in the basement. Husband and I are definitely starting to feel the reality of this baby being with us very soon. Exciting and scary even on the second go around.

Make Your Own Microwave Popcorn

2009-08-31T15:25:00.000-07:00

It's kind of insane that I had neither heard of this or thought to do it myself before. I am somewhat of a popcorn fiend. It is one of my favoritest snacks in the whole world. I pretty much enjoy it no matter how it's prepared. Air popped, on the stove, in a microwave bag laden with buttery-flavored chemicals....When I worked in an office I made microwave popcorn all the time. At home my default method is on the stovetop, served with lots of salt and sometimes butter if I'm feeling like indulging.

So an FB friend posted this Alton Brown "recipe" and i had to try it immediately.

Ingredients

* 1/4 cup good quality popcorn
* 2 teaspoons olive oil
* 1/4 teaspoon kosher salt or popcorn salt
* Sprinkle jalapeno seasoning mix
* Paper lunch bag
* Stapler

Directions

Toss the popcorn with the olive oil, salt, and jalapeno seasoning mix in the paper bag. Fold the top of the bag over and staple the bag twice to close. Place the bag in the microwave and microwave on high for 2 minutes to 3 minutes, or until there are about 5 seconds between pops.

I use tape to fasten the bag. It is a bit greasy in the microwave after- but still better than cleaning a pot! The popcorn is absolutely light and fluffy. I think that popcorn salt would probably work better than the kosher- I usually end up adding more salt after.

Dee-licious!

Kashless

2009-08-28T18:55:00.000-07:00

Today we moved Miss D into her new room. This left us with the problem of what to do with our guest bed.

Our first bed from when we first moved in together, the platform frame was gifted to us from someone else. The mattress was about 10 years old but it was a guest bed for about half that so it was in pretty good shape. The metal frame we were pretty sure would be gone from the alley in seconds if we put it out there, but we didn't know what to do about the mattress. I was pretty sure most goodwill/salvation army places will not take used mattresses. Did you know that mattresses take up a lot of landfill space? Most mattresses have a lifespan of about 10 years. There is actually a lot of recyclable material in mattresses but it is a difficult process to extract. Only a few companies are doing it in only a few states. It seemed a shame to add another to the pile, especially when ours was in perfectly usable condition.

During a quick google search i came upon Kashless, a brand new site that takes the Freecycle ethos to a whole new level. It is very user friendly although it had a few additional features that I didn't realize were available to me. Basically, if you are looking to give something away you can post it to Kashless. The same post can then be simultaneously posted to craigslist and freecycle sites in your area as well as be linked to your facebook and Twitter accounts (as you desire) Within 30 minutes of placing my listing I had 25 responses! We were able to get rid of the bed by the end of the day. The post was just as easy to remove as it was to list, and the responses stopped immediately.

A couple of nice features that I didn't realize when I posted. It's not clear- but the Kashless users can respond to your post. I didn't understand this so i left a phone number that went to a voicemail box- we got a number of additional replies to that and it was completely unnecessary. I got email notifications for all the responses and replied to them all individually but when I checked Kashless later, they also housed the responses and had a feature where you could reply to all at once. This would have made managing the process a lot easier if I had known it was available!

I would definitely recommend this site to anyone looking to give away unwieldy things like furniture or electronics. It was pretty insane to go from thinking we had something no one would want to fighting people off with a stick in 30 minutes!

As someone looking for free goods to obtain, it looks pretty awesome too. In addition to people who post directly to the site, it has software that trolls craigslist and freecycle for free listings and pulls them to Kashless. You can even set up searches and have Kashless email you when something you're looking for turns up. We could really use an additional laptop so i may be trying this soon!

Mothers are Wonderful

2009-08-27T07:34:00.000-07:00

It's a little late to be talking about last weekend, but we had such a wonderful visit with my Mom. Friday we did the farm thing and that evening she stayed home with Miss D so Husband and I could go to a gathering for a friend of ours that happened to be visiting the same weekend. Saturday we put her to work as ALL of us painted Miss D's new room. (she is moving into the guest room) She chose two shades of purple and we also had to paint the ceiling white. Luckily, my mom has painted most of her own house herself so between her and husband we had a lot of experience going on! We pretty much finished the whole room in a single day. Sunday morning us ladies went to the farmers market to pick up a few things for the brunch we were having. My out-of-town friend and her husband came over and we had a leisurely dining experience in the yard. The weather was actually beautiful for a change! Mom had more time playing with Miss D as he and I drove our friends in the vert to their respective airports. We grilled burgers and the sweetest corn in the world for dinner. Monday the girls went to the Botanic Gardens where Mom got to take lots of pictures and Miss D and I played princess honeybee.

It was a perfect visit with a great balance of work, play, talking and relaxation. Can't wait to have her come again!

Volkening Heritage Farm

2009-08-24T13:59:00.000-07:00

My mom has been in town since Thursday night. We had a really great weekend together with a great balance of fun, work and relaxation.

On Friday we went to the Volkening Heritage Farm in Schaumburg. It is a restored, working farm being run as if it were the 1800's. There are actually quite a few similar places in the surrounding area. This one had a couple of things going for it, first and foremost being that it is 100% free! It is also located on a nature preserve that has prairie, wetland and wooded areas. Much of the paths are paved which is great for the stroller set.

Probably the neatest thing about the farm portion is that you can just wander around all of the buildings and the kids are allowed to touch all of the items. There is a big barn with hayloft, a farmhouse with vegetable garden, and a chicken coop. The farm keeps a few cows, a couple of horses, lots of chickens and some ducks and geese. There are a few people around in historical garb and you can ask them questions, but other than that you are left to your own devices. Miss D liked the barn the best, although she found it stinky.

I'm sure it's crazier on the weekends but it was a very fun free thing to do with the kid.

Something Nice

2009-08-20T05:51:00.001-07:00

One thing I love is that every time I go up to bed I look at my alarm clock....and do nothing.

After umpteen years of making sure a button was pressed, a very nice feeling.

Sweet Corn

2009-08-19T06:16:00.000-07:00

I grew up in Maryland and every summer we could look forward to sweet corn. Silver Queen was the inevitable variety. White and sweet, it was easily found by the side of the road (our hometown abutted a lot of farms, at least during my childhood). Husband grew up in the Bay Area and also grew up on white sweet corn (10 for a $1 at the roadside farm stand).

In IL, land of large agribusiness corn, a lot of corn is advertised as sweet but it rarely is. Almost always bi-color, it is generally a sturdy, bland tasting thing that serves as a vehicle for lots of butter and salt and pepper.

But we got lucky at the farmer's market yesterday and scored some ears of the sweetest corn I've ever had in IL- no condiments required.

Sadly we only bought 5 ears- which we devoured amongst the 3 of us last night. So I have to keep my fingers crossed they will have more next week!

Found

2009-08-18T06:11:00.000-07:00

A friend took these pics as part of an independent project of children and found objects. I just love them.

All images by Christina Noel www.christinanoel.smugmug.com

Direction

2009-08-16T05:52:00.000-07:00

Thanks to all who commented on my last post. One of the reasons i am so happy I started this blog is getting to reach out to so many good people at once! ;)

I guess a lot of you know me better than I thought as i got a number of inquiries about whether or not we were moving to CA. And to be honest, at the beginning of last week that was a real consideration. But as we discussed it further, we realized that we would have had to move immediately what with the timing of the baby and the time of year likelihood of finding a renter or buyer for our house....so we are holding off for the moment.

The catalyst for all this is that Husband has also lost his source of steady income.

It was a stressful and emotionally exhausting week but the upshot is that Husband is getting ready to start his own business. He is getting lots of help and is positioned as positively as possible at this stage in the game so there is every reason to believe that the financial future will be bright.

It is kind of amazing that after a year of worrying everything should befall us in the same month. But isn't crisis what instigates change? Having nothing to lose makes it a lot easier to take risks.

Whirlwind

2009-08-12T17:23:00.000-07:00

I guess i left it open there on the messy eating comment, but now I am paranoid about my table manners thank you very much.

I try to keep this blog light. But so much is going on around me that I don't have the energy today to come up with anything.

So much to think about and decide that affects everything.

Exciting and scary and exhausting.

Sorry to be so vague but it seems pointless to discuss anything in such a public way until i know which direction the ship is sailing...

26 Weeks

2009-08-11T19:18:00.001-07:00

I haven't had much to say about the pregnancy because there haven't been that many changes of late.

A commenter on my last post was very correct to point out that I have been very fortunate with the summer weather, with only a few very hot days. Today the weather dropped back down to a beautiful 80 degrees.

I do feel that i am transitioning from being uncomfortable much of the time to being uncomfortable most of the time. i am very grateful to be out of spending all day in an office chair as i am usually able to shift position (standing, sitting, lying down) as often as i need to.

After mentioning at my last doctor visit that i wasn't feeling a lot of strong kicks, I have noticed his movements becoming MUCH stronger. Still not a lot of sharp movements. (which I suppose I should be grateful for!) But a lot of scrambling and strong pushes. To the point where they are visible.

I'm not sure if it's the weather but I think my feet are getting swollen. A symptom I didn't get the last time and am not really excited about.

Also, I can't seem to eat anything without some of it going down my shirt and/or ending up on my belly. Am I always this messy of an eater? Or is it that these types of crumbs would normally pass easily by my non-gaping cleavage and protruding belly? Please say it is the latter!

Heat is on

2009-08-10T20:17:00.000-07:00

I spent the weekend trying to stay indoors and not take my lumbering self into the summer heat- which has finally arrived. Most of that was spent cleaning our house. Not very exciting and fairly exhausting but very neccessary.

Today I took Miss D and our free kids pass from the library to the Field Museum...only to discover it was already free day. (every 2nd monday of the month) Needless to say it was PACKED. We managed to have fun though. Probably her favorite exhibit was the history of the earth, which includes the dinosaur bones. She also was pretty interested in the early hominids. It is fairly challenging to explain the concept of evolution in 4 year old terms. I'm not sure I did the best job.

Who is this?

2009-08-07T19:29:00.000-07:00

Tonight for dinner i made pork chops, corn on the cob and baked potatoes.

What the hell has happened to me?

Before you know it i will be voting republican.

Tuckered

2009-08-06T19:18:00.000-07:00

This summer vacation thing is starting to wear me out.

Today I was so tired all day. I'm definitely walking a lot more, which is probably good for me. But I am wiped! And I can't get the kid to nap to save my life.

sighz

Living the SAH Life- Day 2

2009-08-04T19:11:00.000-07:00

So far the week seems more like an extended weekend than a new lifestyle. Today Miss D was asking where her father was a lot. I guess she is used to us all being at home at the same time.

I had many plans to keep her on a preschool-esque daily schedule, complete with many learning activities, but my will to implement it is fading fast. There will be plenty of time to do that in September when she is back in school twice a week. Why not have one full month of a true summer vacation?

Monday we spent all day at a friends for an extended playdate. Today we went to the farmer's market in the morning and picked up fruit and veg for the week. We stopped by the library and loaded up on books. When we got home the first red tomato was there in the garden!After lunch and a brief attempt at a nap we went to the duck pond to feed the ducks. The ducks were not around but the fish were happy to nibble on the bread. We bought popsicles from a passing cart and Miss D had a blast running around the creek dropping leaves into the water and hopping on stones. For dinner I made Squash pizza and a salad with yogurt dressing.

Tomrrow we plan to hit the pool.

i could get used to this!

Family Portrait

2009-08-03T19:38:00.000-07:00

Spoke too Soon

2009-08-02T19:50:00.000-07:00

Seems like it was just last week I was complaining that the garden wasn't fruiting fast enough. Turns out we had this monstrosity growing right underneath our noses.

Allow me to just nip the comments in the bud by saying I am more than aware of what it looks like...a giant unicorn horn of course!

I was nervous that it would be old and bitter. But when I cut it open the seeds were just barely starting to develop. It made a delicious cucumber salad.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life

2009-07-31T12:25:00.000-07:00

As most of you know by now, I was laid off from my job. Today was my very last day. But I haven't been able to share the details with most of you.

This was not a great surprise. The threat of something like this happening has been hanging over my head off and on for almost a year now. The company I work(ed) for is a vendor for the mortgage industry.

I had a slight choice in the matter. I was told that I would have to take a significant pay cut to remain on the payroll. (You may recall I had already taken a cut back in October) Once I went home and ran the numbers, it was evident that we would not be able to afford our full time childcare at the new salary level. Conversely, if I went on unemployment and took Miss D out of preschool we would be about even. In addition, Husband and I had been holding off determining how we were going to pay for childcare for 2 once the baby was born. (Things have been very up and down at both our employers this year) Even if things stayed exactly as they were (with no pay cut) we would not be able to afford the childcare. Meaning that even if I had decided to stay on, I would most likely have to quit when the baby was born- leaving us with no additional income at that time. Whereas now, we will at least have unemployment coming in for a while after the baby is born. Giving me some time to work out a new source of income.

So for purely financial reasons, it made the most sense for us to take the layoff.

Now there are also a number of fringe benefits....:

- I will get to have several months home with Miss D before the new baby comes. I am so looking forward to getting to spend the one-on-one time with her. She is old enough now that I hope we can create some great memories she can carry forever.

- I will get to have plenty of time at home with the new baby. I had to go back to work 8 weeks after Miss D was born and felt immense guilt for most of the first 2 years of her life for not being around. I feel so blessed that I will get to spend time with both of my children.

- I have been unhappy at my job for YEARS. It was not a career that I went into intentionally and the workplace became increasingly more unpleasant and didactic as the years went on and on.

- I have the opportunity to search for work that is meaningful and fits the lifestyle I want. When we first decided, my immediate thought was to try to find the highest paying part time job that I could. But Husband said, "Why not take this time to find something you actually want to do. After all, you won't want to be unemployed forever..." It took him saying that to make me realize that now is the time to do what I've been struggling with for YEARS. If this recession has taught me nothing else, it is that life is not all about the Benjamins for me.

This is not to say that this decision is all sunshine and rainbows. Husband's employment future remains insecure so we will be on our toes for a while.

So I'm not sure what these life changes will mean for this blog. I don't know if I will blog more or less- but I'm willing to bet there will be a big shift in content! I'm very excited to get started.

So much to say

2009-07-30T06:17:00.000-07:00

I promise I will have a big ol' post for you tomorrow. I have so much to tell you but have to wait.

garden bounty

2009-07-27T18:35:00.000-07:00

Not to make it a yard- centric week, but we are finally starting to see some edible things in our vegetable garden. I should probably go back and look at my archives, but it seems to me that this time last year we were already harvesting tomatoes and such. This year so far the tomato plants and cucumbers are lousy with fruit but they don't seem to be in any great hurry to turn colors and/or reach maturity. The pepper plants are very tiny and each have a few tiny peppers, but they too don't seem like they want to turn colors yet. dangit. The broccoli and brussles sprouts aren't doing anything yet but getting bigger and bigger.

I was getting impatient so I harvested the beets week ago. I probably should have waited a little longer so they got a bit bigger.
They were fine. Not particularly tasty. It is always disappointing when something you've put time and effort into isn't the best thing you've ever eaten. Shouldn't something you've grown yourself automatically taste better then something from the store? Sadly, no.

The chard turned out well though.
Swiss chard is a great green to grow because you can leave it in your garden and harvest from it continually all season by just taking the outer leaves. It does tend to get a bit more bitter mid-season but then is sweet again in the fall.

It seems to me I read somewhere that broccoli will re-flower too. Does anyone know if that is true or am I crazy?

Yard 1 year later

2009-07-26T18:23:00.000-07:00

A recent post from my Aunt B, made me realize that I've been wanting to share how much our yard has changed since last year. We really made a very small investment (probably under $1K all told including patio and furniture)and it makes such a huge difference. We spend so much of our time out in our yard. On the weekends we may eat both lunch and dinner out there. I go out in the mornings to read or talk on the phone. Miss D scampers in the sprinkler or the kiddie pool or just runs around. It was definitely worth every penny- and probably more!

It's amazing how much it's grown in since just last year. To refresh your memory, here's what it looke like when we planted it last spring:

And here's what it looks like now:

Sideview last year:

This year:

An added unplanned bonus: I purposely requested mainly native plants that wouldn't require a lot of effort on our part to keep up. All of them attract a lot of bees* which make me feel like we are contributing to the ecosystem. ;)

*We've managed to keep Miss D pretty cool about the bees. She knows that if you don't bother them- they won't bother you.

Closed!

2009-07-23T06:23:00.000-07:00

We closed our refi last night. That is all.

Getting It

2009-07-22T06:07:00.000-07:00

Husband and I for a while have been doing our best to prepare Miss D for the changes that will come when the new baby is here. One of the things we are trying our darndest to do is to get her to be more self-sufficient. Particularly with the things we know she can do herself, but often we end up helping her/doing it for her because it is easier than dealing with the fallout when she's not in the mood. This includes things like turning on the light in the bathroom when she goes potty, dressing herself, and most importantly bedtime things like getting her own drink of water or turning on her music at night.

Last night, when she was giving him a hard time about doing something herself, Husband told Miss D, "You've got to learn to do this by yourself. When the baby comes, Mommy and Daddy are going to need your help. We won't be able to do all these things for you." This being a fairly typical refrain around here, he then went on to say,

H: How much attention do you think you get from me and Mama right now?
Miss D: ...100?
H: That's right. And when the new baby comes, how much attention do you think you will get?
Miss D:......
H: 50. It will only be half as much as you get now.

At the moment it seemed to slide right off her and well, I ended up getting up and turning the bathroom light on. But after she went to bed, we heard her crying around 10pm and Husband went up to check on her. She was sobbing her heart out and saying something about how when the baby came no one would play Zingo with her. Husband calmed her down and said of course there would still be time for Zingo games.

I went upstairs around 20 minutes later and she came into my room, still red-faced and puffy-eyed with the same issue. I took her into her room and said that though things will be different we will always have time to play games with her, and maybe someday her baby brother will be able to play with us too. She will always be our special little girl that we love with all our hearts and no baby will change that.

Oooooo. It's going to be so hard though!

Small Gestures

2009-07-20T06:00:00.000-07:00

This is the post from Friday that never got published....(so mind the "yesterday's")

A friend of mine who suffers from depression once told me that a very small gesture I made made a huge difference to him and helped him through a difficult period with his illness. At the time, I was very honored to think that anything I could have done would have been helpful, even if I didn't really understand how anything so small could make so much of a difference.

Yesterday i had a terribly stressful early evening. Husband was supposed to drop the car off with me after work so he could go to his softball game and i could go pick up the Dukes at preschool and and take her and my father to dinner at this dumpling place I have been wanting to try. Unfortunately, Husband had been out in the burbs all day working on a job and got stuck in hideous traffic on the way back in. No way he could reach me in time for me to pick up Miss D. Of course, I had already given him my train card so he would have it on the way home. I managed to quickly scrounge some change so I could use an exact fare on the train. It was 5:20 by the time I got on the Brown Line. (Halfway to my stop before anyone offered me a seat. Assholes!) The train is slow and keeps stopping. By the time I reach my stop it is 5:49 and I have exactly 11 mins to reach preschool before we are dinged with a late charge. As I get off the train, the sky has darkened and it starts to sprinkle. (needless to say I have no rain gear) Miraculously, I am able to waddle there with a whopping 4 mins to spare. By the time we get out, the wind has picked up and it seems to be raining harder. I have been wrestling with a very big decision since Wednesday so the additional stress (plus pregnancy hormones no doubt) is bringing me close to tears as Miss D is asking me for an umbrella and I am trying to tell her it will be an adventure to walk the 4 blocks to the train in the wind and rain when a Mom I am friendly with asks me where we are going, and when she finds out offers to give us a lift to the station. Not only that, but when I realize that i should have plunked in the fare for a transfer and I am out of change for a full fare, she bums me a quarter.

Not a big deal right? Such a small thing. Just to give us a 2 minute ride and lend me a quarter but somehow the kindness of the gesture completely calmed me down.

Miss D and I had a fine ride home and a loooong walk to the house. (Due to her high and playful spirits thankfully and not due to whining and complaining)

Holy Crap

2009-07-17T07:05:00.000-07:00

I was just about to hit post when I found out my Grandpa's house was destroyed by lightning last night.

Thank god it appears he and Unique (the dog) are alright. But I have no way to get in touch with him and it is driving me crazy!

22 Weeks (and counting)

2009-07-15T06:09:00.000-07:00

I know that many of my loyal readers will be anxious to hear about my latest pregnancy issues. Give the people what they want I say!

- When I went to the doctor last week I had gained 9 Lbs since my previous visit. (At the previous visit I had only gained 1 lb. Said my doctor, "Maybe we weighed you wrong last time.....")

- My belly button is already half sticking out. WTF? This is not supposed to happen until at least the 3rd trimester.

- In pleasant news, since I bought my expensive wonder sandals I haven't had a single foot cramp.

- Husband located my maternity pillow from last time. For those of you who have never seen one it is sort of a giant, "J" shaped thing. Between that and the pillow for my back it is a lucky thing we have a king sized bed!

- This may be a little TMI, so if you have delicate sensibilities please go ahead and skip down. But holy crap am I constipated. (this happened with Miss D too) I am popping Colace like it's candy, not to mention taking DHA supplements which are supposed to help and drinking tons of water. I am afeared I am going to have to take the next step and go to eating nothing but roughage and whole grains. Flax seed maybe? gah.

I had a thought yesterday that in addition to decorating Miss D's new room, (She will be taking over the guest room) I am going to need to "butch up" the baby's room. It's pretty girly in there.

Pom poms

2009-07-14T06:17:00.000-07:00

It's funny, I never think of myself as a "crafty" person. Craft projects are not something I tend to do on my own in my spare time. But somehow I end up doing a lot of them with my daughter. i think this is partly because it was something my mother did with me and my sisters when we were growing up, and partly for something cheap and new for us to do together.

Miss D is getting to the age where television commercials are starting to work their magic on her and she has been asking for a product heavily advertised on the kids networks called Benderoos. Husband suggested that we could buy pipe cleaners for a lot less so when Miss D and I had the day off on July 3rd we headed out to the craft store. We went up and down the aisles looking at all the different types of materials and boxed craft kits available. We found the pipe cleaners eventually, but she saw the jumbo sized bag of multi-colored and multi-sized pom poms and fell in love. I remembered we had lots of googly eyes and other hoo ha at home (we have lots of supplies left over from our puppet days) and quickly thought up an easy project we could do together. Pom Pom animals!

The pic is kind of terrible, but they are supposed to be bears and caterpillars. Bet you can't tell which one I made and which one Miss D made! It was super easy for her to glue the pom poms together, with only a few minutes of frustration when they fell apart on occasion. My favorite part was her creative add ons. As we were finishing up our caterpillars she found a smaller pom pom that she stuck on the end. "And do you know what this is Mom? It's his fart" (hilarious laughter)

Needless to the say the "farterpillar" as it came to be known was a big hit at school.

Endless Weekend

2009-07-13T06:21:00.000-07:00

This was one of those weekends that seemed to stretch out long and empty in front of us and by the end seemed like we hadn't been able to squeeze in everything we wanted to do.

The weather was absolutely gorgeous the whole time, in the low 80's and sunny. So you know we spent a lot of time in the new(old) car! Friday night we took our inaugaural spin in the "vert" by heading to the Superdawg Drive-In. Miss D's first experience eating dinner in the car. She mainly loved it, although she did complain of it being cold and too windy any time we picked up any speed.

Saturday morning we drove out to Woodlawn for dental appointments for Miss D and Husband. Husband got cavaties filled and Miss D was pronounced cavity-free and walked away with loads of dental loot. (toothbrush, stickers, etc.) In the afternoon Miss D splashed around in the kiddie pool in the backyard while husband lovingly cleaned and inspected the new(old) car, declaring it to be in excellent condition as promised. We then took a drive over to Zola Jones to show off the car to Mr. Jones (the only friend we have that really is that into cars). Miss D and I went in the store to check out all the new goods. He has the cutest oilcloth totes for the summer. Perfect for the beach or pool, I was kicking myself for running out without my wallet. I will have to get back there before he runs out! Saturday evening Miss D had her very first swimming class. I was able to watch the whole thing. She was a little nervous at first, but her instructor was great with her and by the time she got out of the pool she yelled to me, "I can swim Mom!" She was dismayed to learn that the next lesson is not for a whole week!

Sunday morning we all got up with the Dukes, put her in the wagon and walked down to the Farmers Market at Independence Park. I was determined to buy fruit. Unfortunately, like most of the "Farmers markets" in Chicago there were very few actual farmers vending there. The majority of the tents were people selling various other things like baked goods, coffee, dog biscuits, etc. The plethora of other types of vendors doesn't usually bother me if the balance is at least 50/50 but there were only 2 or 3 fruit and veg stands so they were way outnumbered. But we got local fruit which is what I wanted and it was a fun way to spend a beautiful morning. On our return Husband and daughter headed out in the new(old) car for a quick trip to Costco and I made Blueberry Boy Bait, which is amazingly delicious and you should all make it today. Then Husband got to washing the outside of both of his beautiful babies in the garage and I cleaned the guest room an upstairs bathroom. My last project of the day was to clean out Miss D's closets and drawers of all the clothes she was outgrown. SO many! We have kept every scrap of clothing she has ever worn (in case we had another girl) so now it is time to get rid of it. i was going to weed through all of it, picking out only the nicest things to give to friends, but even just going through what was in her room I was absolutely overwhelmed. Luckily I thought to call Mrs. Kegz, who is not only happy to take things off my hands, but has kept all her boy stuff from her son C and is ready to unload! So now we just have to arrange a time to swap and go through everything. Huzzoo!

We of course grilled both Saturday and Sunday night. De-I is in town tonight and we plan to do the same. Hope your weekend was just as pleasant!

Childhood

2009-07-09T20:00:00.000-07:00

A childhood friend posted this pic on facebook yesterday and it brought up so many thoughts that I knew I had to put it up here too. I don't have a whole lot of memories of childhood (or in general really, my mind is a sieve- unless it comes to memorizing lines).

- Both of us have the same name. My entire life growing up there was always at least one other girl in my class that had the same name and sometimes there were more. This is what pushes me to find unique names for my own children.

- You may have noticed that I am dressed in head-to-toe purple. I don't remember if purple was a favorite color of mine. (I did end up choosing it for my bedroom, but I vaguely remember blue was my first choice) BUT THIS IS INTERESTING BECAUSE, Miss D's favorite color has been purple since before she could even say the word.

- The Jelly-Bracelet chain linking the two of us just kills me. Not only for the totally 80's goodness, but also in that we were friends and we chose to express it at this event by literally chaining ourselves to each other. Miss D is only a few years away from this kind of friendship gesture.....

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In unrelated goodness, it has been a good week. In addition to the baby news:

REFI FOLLOW UP: Per a commenter's advice, I got in touch with a mortgage broker who felt that our best/only chance at qualifying for a refi would be through the HASP program. We went through a referral chain to find someone at our lender that could help us and we were not only able to refi- but at a significantly reduced interest rate! woot!

PRESENT TODAY: Our new(old) car comes today! Crossing our fingers for no rain.....

WORK UNEVENTFUL: It is the mere calm before the storm, but relaxing nonetheless

Boy

2009-07-09T06:04:00.001-07:00

Shortly after we got home from the ultrasound, Husband looked at me and said, "Well, looks like your method worked."

In all the many long months of pregnancy that followed, I completely forgot that husband and I had actually made an effort to influence the gender of our unborn baby. So, for those of you following along at home I will tell you what we did.

There is a theory that swimmers carrying the XY are very fast but die sooner and those that carry XX are slower but last longer. So, if you imagine this to be true supposedly you can increase your chances of having a boy by attempting your baby-making activities earlier in your ovulation cycle. Giving the XY's more of a chance to get to the egg first you see. Now if you wanted to be very sure about this i guess you would be taking your temperature and watching your cervical fluid excretions to be sure you knew exactly where you were in your cycle. The only thing I did was count the days from the end of my period. So I wouldn't exactly call our situation scientific proof or anything.

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Even though we had initially wanted a boy, (As Husband says, "Done!"), in the last couple of weeks leading up to the ultrasound I had sort of fallen in love with the idea of another girl. For one thing, we don't tend to throw a lot of boys on my side. (My generation on my father's side is all girls and on my Mother's side the boys are outnumbered) So I didn't want to get my hopes up too much. Then i found a girl's name i was absolutely in LOVE with. Miss D wanted a girl. (She also wanted to name it Miss D 2) I grew up in a mainly female household. Then I thought about the wonderful relationships I have with my sisters and how nice it would be for Miss D to have one too. So although i am thrilled (and a little nervous) about having a boy, there is a weensy bit of mourning for the little girl I am not having.

Goodbye little Leyli Agnes....

One Chicken- Two Meals

2009-07-08T06:15:00.000-07:00

As you may have noticed, when it comes to cooking chicken I am mainly concerned with crispy skin, crispy skin, and crispy skin. Roasting is an ideal and pretty darn easy way to gain it. Lately I had become enamored of the idea of spatchcocking. It has been popularized recently in the arena of grilling, but I figured it would just as well if not better in the oven. After all, all that yummy skin that is usually on the bottom of your traditionally roasted bird is now on top, resulting in...oh yeah, more crispy skin. (You will note that although I removed the backbone, I still left the tail attached off to the left hand side of the pic. I am wiley!) Not only do you get more crispy skin for your efforts, but the chicken also cooks much faster. I did mine at a 400 degree convection oven and it was done in a mere 40 mins! Pretty darn quick- even weeknight quick. It took me all of 5 mins to cut out the back bone with my trusty kitchen sissors. A quick sprinkle with lots of coarse salt and pepper, chuck it in the oven and bam. A quick parboil of some sweetpeas on the side and we had dinner. Would you believe that between my daughter and myself we ate ALL the skin off this bird that night? (What can I say? The apple doesn't fall far from the tree....) And after all, that stuff doesn't keep!

Although my love for roast chicken knows no bounds, I have a hard time deciding what to do with the inevitible leftovers. Since I started eating certain meats again, there has been a lot of experimenting with what I can make that will satisfy everyone in my family. Particularly myself, as I still have a lot of weird hangups about meat. I don't like it in salads. I can't handle it "hidden" in anything like a sandwich or tortilla, or drowned in lots of sauce. Soup, however, I can do. ONLY if I or someone I know makes it. (never a can or at a restaurant- don't ask me why! I am weird!) I often make tortilla soup- which husband and I love but Miss D is pretty ambivalent about- so I wanted to try something different. Chicken Soup with Rice is a great one. It works better for a weeknight if you can make the stock the night before. Chuck the chicken carcass and some veggies and herbs in a pot with some (store-bought)chicken stock for an hour, cook your dinner for that night whilst it simmers. Bonus is that leaving the stock in the fridge overnight makes it that much easier to skim off the fat the next day. (Yes, you could just use the chicken stock by itself but this extra step gives it so much more flavor and depth) To make the soup you reheat the broth, add some veggies and rice cook until the rice is done and throw in the leftover shredded chicken at the end. Easy and quick!

I have made this soup before, but I think what really made it this time was the addition of fresh savory that I got in my Fresh Picks box. I've never worked with fresh savory before and it is so yummy and goes with everything I've tried it with so far. (Such as the zucchini pasta i made the night the stock was cooking) I will definitely make an effort to find some to plant in my garden next year.

I don't know if it was the savory, or if Miss D was enamored of the idea of eating something from a song or a book (we own it) but she ate every last drop.

Never the Right Time to Refi

2009-07-07T06:15:00.000-07:00

When we bought our house we decided on an ARM because we were not planning to stay in the house for longer than 5 years. Of course the economic collapse has stymied all our plans. Our payments are manageable at the moment. (Although a lower one would be very helpful!) But things are very iffy after all and who knows what will happen? We are trying to be fiscally responsible, and refinance into a 30 year before things change but it seems like we are always thwarted by something.

When the rates first dropped I called around, people took my calls but then didn't get back to us. Eventually we decided to take a break, concerned that our credit score would be affected by having too many people look at it- and taking the chance that the interest rate wouldn't rise anytime soon.

So now the interest rates have gone up, we were going to wait it out, but our circumstances are very volatile at the moment so I thought I'd call and see what our chances are now. Only to find out that now this is going on. Husband's office has had 2 deals fall through due to low appraisals. And we certainly don't want to spend money on multiple appraisals if one comes back lowball. The number the mortgage rep at my lender quoted me yesterday made me burst into tears, although Husband was able to talk me back of the ledge.

So now it looks like we are back to waiting and seeing, perhaps even to the point when the ARM comes up. I think I am just frustrated at not being able to take the reins and control my own destiny with this.

July 4

2009-07-06T06:12:00.000-07:00

Hope you all had a delightful 4th of July. As you can see, it rained here for much of the day. Nonetheless, we managed to have a good time. My bandmember T and his wife had invited us to their neighborhood block party. They live in Jefferson Park, an area heavily populated with civil servants. (Policemen and firemen mostly) I knew it would be an opportunity for a real "Chicago" experience, and we couldn't pass it up!

When we arrived, the light sprinkling that had been falling much of the afternoon turned into full-fledged downpour. Which cancelled the fire truck visitation and band that was scheduled to end the night. Everybody was still out in their yards BBQing under tents and umbrellas. The street was full of kids running around wearing trash bags or just getting wet. The T.'s have a roomy covered porch so we were able to enjoy the view and ambiance without too much discomfort. And when the sun finally came out, their house turned out to have an excellent view of the forthcoming activities.

First up, a water balloon toss. Kids and adults both participated in two huge lines that stretched down the block. That was followed by an egg toss for adults only. Then there was a raffle that everyone on the block had donated a prize to- and there were some pretty good prizes! Including a weber grill, wine basket, kids bicycle and a grand prize of $250 cash. (sadly, we didn't win anything) After that was bingo, which we chose to skip, in favor of sitting on the lawn and watching the neighborhood fireworks show. Miss D had been saying for days how she wanted to see fireworks. I was slightly concerned that she would miss the big organized fireworks display we went to last year- but for nothing. Fireworks is fireworks to kids, whether it is a big show with music, or your neighbor setting them off in the alley.

Which was exactly what our neighbor two doors down was doing when we got home.

Miss D and Little T enjoying the raffle

Justin Roberts

2009-07-05T06:49:00.000-07:00

Is who we'll be spending the afternoon with...

Look what we got

2009-07-01T06:20:00.001-07:00

You must ignore the color to appreciate it's beauty...

Husband says it is a classic...

That's a 20 year old untouched interior folks...

O yes, we prefer a manual.

I can make you a mix tape!

Not to mention the best part....

20 Weeks and I know nothing

2009-06-30T06:13:00.000-07:00

At 20 weeks one is able to schedule the ultrasound when (among other things)you can find out the sex of your unborn child.

For some reason my next doctor appointment is not until next week, so it seemed silly to schedule the ultrasound for this week when I have to go back next week.

But I am going INSANE with curiosity.