Monday, February 26, 2007

FLOOD! (Or, how I spent my Sunday)

OH. There were so many amusing anecdotes I was going to relate today, but instead my back is aching and I must tell you why.

Saturday, Chicago was hit with a slushy, icy, freezing, snowy storm that left a bunch of crazy crap on the ground. All of which began to melt on Sunday. And began to seep into our basement.

Luckily it was seeping in a spot of our "mud room" which is lower from the rest of the basement and separated by a door. Also, we had cleared most of the stuff that was in that room a couple of weeks ago when a pipe burst. (Ho! ho! another delightful tale)

Husband noticed it when he was shoveling and told me about it before he left for work at noon. He warned me there was a good chance I would not be able to leave for band practice right when he got back around 5:30. He also mentioned that our neighbour had offered him the use of a pump, but Husband turned him down. And so, neighbour and wife departed for church, never to be seen again. (at least in the context of this story)

Around 1pm, I put a load of laundry in and took a peek in the mud room. I sizable lake had already formed. By 2pm I put Yelena down for a nap, and went down to face the torrents.

The preferred method for removing water from this area as determined by husband is to open the door to the outside and utilise a plastic snow shovel to "scoop" the water up the six steps where it will land with a "SPLASH!" Mainly on the wide expanse of pavement that is directly adjacent to the steps but if you have good upper body strength, a portion may land on the lawn at this time. It is then necessary to stomp up the stairs in your waterlogged boots (perhaps silently cursing husband for turning down the offer of a pump in your mind) and scccrrrraaaaape the accumulated water off the sidewalk with a LIFT! at the end to send the water as far onto the lawn as possible. For otherwise it will simply slide back down the sidewalk, down the steps, and back into the basement from whence it came.

So I did this for about an hour until the water was at such a level that by the time I finished scccrrraaaaping it had already filled up to the same level as when I had last shoveled it.

Then I cried.

No I didn't. Then I went up and took a hot shower and my frozen, wet feet turned angry red and itchy. Then I went to the computer to look up pumps and I got on the phone to my bestest goodest friend in all the world, Mrs. H. And Mrs. H, in her very good and kind and wonderful manner agreed to come over and assist me in assessing the situation, and said she would watch The Dukes if I needed to run to the hardware store. I sat down for 5 minutes and then The Dukes woke up.

Then I cried.

No I didn't. Then I called my house-handy uncle who was luckily visiting at my parents house where he could easily be reached. (Husband cannot take calls at work) H-H Uncle was able to give me excellent advice and 3 pumping options and I took this well-earned knowledge to the Crappy Beaver where I purchased a pump! And then I got home and hooked it all up by myself and even plugged it in which i was scared to do cause there was water everywhere and....nothing happened.

And I cried.

No I didn't. Can you believe it? I never actually shed tears the whole time. I think I was numb. (ha ha!) So Mrs. H left and an hour later husband came home and after much other hilarity, (Um, husband got it to work but I had neglected to mention I hadn't screwed the adaptors on very tightly so he got a little damp..and other adventures with hoses) we got the water out! Around 10pm. Or husband did.

And today.....it is frozen!

The End

8 comments:

Pulisha said...

(((Steffie))) That is hilarious (and it made me want to cry for you!). Adult-hood sucks sometimes, doesn't it?

alexis said...

lisa, you stole the words right out of my mouth! You poor, poor, poor, poor, poor thing! Is there anything you guys can do to stop it from happening again?

stef said...

hopefully, we will figure out exactly where the water was coming in and plug it up. As husband says, "These are the joys of homeownership!"

Anonymous said...

You're theatre people. Think of all the skit material! Have Mom tell you about her adventures with the swamp cooler and the floods from above.

Anonymous said...

What you need is a house-handy uncle who lives in Chicago, so he can come over and fix it for you. Hope it's not too hard to repair.

(And right now I'm oh-so-glad I'm a renter...)

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear about all the trouble. Floods are awful. Nasty mess. After college, I lived in my mom's basement that flooded very regularly. My entire room was up on wooden blocks.

Stacy said...

Oh no! Sorry to hear about the flooding. I was complaining about shoveling the watery slush of the sidewalk which was not up 6 steps. I hope it doesn't happen again!

Anonymous said...

Ugh. A flood. I've had two such events in my condo, one where sewer water came in!! Sounds like you handled it pretty well though. Kudos!! See, this is why guys don't cry; we're too busy trying to stem the tide (literally) to have time!